July 20, 2004
Recent Posts

Here are some recent posts I made to mailing lists. They seem to reflect my life:

*********

TUESDAY, JULY 6, 2004

Sorry for those who receive this multiple times. I am on a RAMPAGE!
Rebecca :)

Hi Group:

I just had a TERRIBLE experience with an organization called Bay Area 2nd Mom's. www.bayarea2ndmom.com . I was looking for an organization to sign up with to provide back-up child care for times when Elan (16 months) is ill and cannot go to daycare. Bay Area 2nd Mom had been recommended to me by a fellow working mother who uses the company in similar situations.

Here is what happened: After having taken literally 10 tries to get anyone there to call me back, I finally received paperwork from the company. That paperwork contains several documents requiring signatures, references and disclaimers of all liabililities (even indeminfications!) if anything goes wrong with the nannies they provide. That I can deal with (I'm good at crossing out and initialing) but what I couldn't take is a requirement that you PHOTOCOPY your CREDIT CARD, both front and back sides, along with a photocopy of your Driver's License and FAX TO THEM!

I told the folks at Bay Area 2nd Mom that it creates unbelievable opportunities for identity theft to photocopy credit cards and FAX to a company, espeically when doing so also with copies of DRIVERS LICENSES! I told them that for the amount I was signing up for ($250 signup fee, plus $6/hour if I ever use a back-up nanny) that requirement was silly. They told me that that was their requirement and they wouldn't change it to me. I asked to speak to a supervisor. About 20 minutes later, as I was about to step into a conference call, their CEO called me.

She went ON AND ON AND ON... I tried to explain to her about AVS systems, alternate security methods, verification options and security codes on the cards, and the fact that a photocopy of the card still won't lead the transactions to be coded by merchant banks and associations other than as card-not-present (you learn this kind of stuff when you work for a payments company ;) but she got really flustered and annoyed and clearly didn't know what I was talking about.

When I told her I needed to jump into a meeting, and just wanted to know whether she was going to waive the photocopy requirement, she got very huffy and insisted that I "listen to her point of view" and she wanted to "call me back to discuss this (presumably at length!) later." I said that I really didn't have time for her point of view, I just wanted yes or no, and really my afternoon was booked. She again got really mad at me and before she could yell at me, I hung up on her (to make it to my meeting!). Then the CEO called back to say that even if I wanted to use her service, she wouldn't let me because I was so rude. Clearly her job does not involve conference calls or needing to be any place at any time.

So anyway, I was shocked by the actions of this CEO. Not only does the company have a horrifyingly irresponsible policy of requiring faxes of credit cards, but their CEO seems to think that she has the right to impose on the time of potential customers.

So those who wanted another entertaining email from me, here it is!

We are using Town and Country instead.

Rebecca

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LATER ON TUESDAY, JULY 6, 2004


Dear PAMP:

On this upcoming Saturday my best friend from childhood is getting
married. I am her bridesmaid (would have been her maid of honor if her
sisters didn't force me out!). I am thrilled and excited to stand at
her wedding in a pink gown at age 36. We have reservations made to fly
to Maine on Thursday morning. My pink dress has already been fed ex'd
to our hotel.

This afternoon my daughter, age 16 months, was diagnosed with an ear
infection. We got her started on anti-biotics this evening, but we are
currently scheduled to fly out on Thursday morning and it is not clear
that she will be cleared up by then. Meanwhile, she has only a lowgrade
fever, and her doctor said she is fine to go to daycare, but just not
necessarily fine to fly. Under normal circumstances I would cancel or
reschedule our trip. In this situation, my best friend is getting
married, and I at least want to know what my options are. I'd like to
know what happens if a toddler flies with a mild ear infection. Can
anyone advise me?

I do know that some people would find me horrible for even considering
putting her on a plane if it is not cleared up entirely. But I can't
imagine going out there without her, even if it means going first and
having my husband follow with her a day or two later. I don't
understand what an ear infection does to an ear, and the nurses and
doctors all seem to say different things. I'd love to hear if any of you
have been through something like this before - I couldn't be the only
mother ever to struggle with a very highly anticipated planned trip
complicated by ear infections?

Thanks,

Rebecca


***********

JULY 19, 2004:

Dear PAMP:

Once again I must thank you for being such an outstanding resource.
About a week and a half ago I posted asking what to do with my 16
month old, who had just come down with an ear infection, and the
family was getting ready to fly to the east coast for my best
friend's wedding, and then a short visit of the mother-in-law in
manhattan. I felt bad because I felt so selfish for not wanting to
cancel this trip or go without Elan (daughter).

You responded with numerous thoughtful and caring emails, making me
feel like a decent person for valuing this wedding and this trip, and
giving me permission to explore whether we could in fact bring an ear-
infected-toddler on a plane. I so appreciated your thoughtful
comments, and kind remarks. They really helped. I also received
much advice, pretty much telling me that it could cause pain to fly
wiht an ear infection, but sometimes the antibiotics do work quickly.

No one asked for a summary, but people did afterwards ask me how it
all worked out, so thus I post now.

As it turned out, Elan's ear infection had miraculously greatly
improved in just a day and a half on anti-biotics, so her doctor
cleared her to fly (I actually brought her to the pediatrician
_twice_ on the day before we were scheduled to take off!) Although
Elan was still on anti-biotics, she was totally fine on the plane --
didn't cry at all during take off or landing (we had brought bottles
for her to drink during those times as well). She was a total
trouper and had a great time during the week. In particular she
loved dancing on the dance floor with the big kids at the wedding,
and running around the Metropolitan Museum of Art on a rainy day in
NYC.

I also wanted to make a quick note about the train: we did okay on
the train (due in part, again, to great train advice from this group)
but there was a family near us that put us completely to shame. They
were traveling with two daughters, a toddler and a kindergartner, and
they had the whole train thing down. As we boarded, they put the
toddler in the stroller, strolled her around for about 2 minutes
until she was asleep (!!!) then placed the stroller in the *one*
place on the whole train that has room for stroller parking, across
from their 4-seat-with-table area in the car one in front of the cafe
cart. Their toddler proceeded to sleep for 2 hours there. If I
could do it again, I too would try to tip the porter as much as they
did, to grab the stroller-parking spot and give Elan a proper nap.
As it turned out, without stoller parking or a car seat to be bucked
into, Elan didn't nap at all on the train, and arrived in NYC a bit
of a wreck. Anyway, just a FWIW about the Acela train.

Thanks again, PAMP!
Rebecca

Posted by rebeca at July 20, 2004 01:18 PM
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