I find that fundamentally, i am a shy person. I tend not to say that anymore; i just keep it to myself. (In the past, when i have claimed my shyness, people would just tend to laugh and laugh - claiming that in no way was i an introvert.) Sure, i can socialize when i need to; i can be polite, even charming as is required by my job, my friends, or the place and time i find myself. And if we're friends? No problems at all.
However, set me in a room full of people i don't know - a party, a bar, what have you. I'll be the kid sitting in the corner, maybe talking to the bartender, maybe reading a book i had tucked away, most likely sipping on my drink, quietly making up stories about people in my head. My brother got all the social skills in our family.... put *him* in a bar? Five minutes later, someone has bought him a drink. Everytime. I guess it's survival to a musician, no?
This weekend reminded me of all of these things; i met a few new people in the comfort of my living room, and i did ok. However, the woman who was outgoing, friendly, and good at drawing you into conversation was the one i wound up interacting with. (Actually, she reminded me very much of James, socially - maybe that had somethign to do with my immediate ease with her.) I went out to my first comic-convention ever, with izzy & jim (also masters of self-introduction). I quite enjoyed tagging along, meeting people as they introduced me. But when i wandered off on my own? Terribly shy about meeting people.
And then there's shy when starstruck - i met Michael Manning, who is a heck of a lot cuter than i thought. Charming, too. And turns out he lives in my 'hood. Actually, i felt pretty proud of myself here, because for the first time in the day, unaided, i stuck my hand out and said "You're Michael? I'm meriko - we *love* your work" and struck up a conversation. Big points for me!
Finally, there's the exception that proves the rule - for some reason, if you work in the food industry, i will likely befriend you. R. teases me about this all the time: "Did you come home from Victoria with all the waitron's phone numbers or email addresses??" It's odd; i find these conversations pretty comfortable and effortless, and i don't feel any of the nervey awful stomachey jittery feelings about striking up a conversation. Why? I have no idea.Posted by meriko at February 11, 2002 05:37 PM